So I want to keep this brief as chances are I may write a proper piece about this later in my future, but I wanted to make a Youtube video out of it, to let people know and to get the word out.
What you’re about to read is one of the new things I do for my Youtube videos and that is the script I wrote. It took 10 minutes to write roughly and it took about 6 minutes to read and improv my way through.
So I just wanted to share with everyone my thoughts, so here is my script with many things I truly believe in that may come back again some day in a different format.
Hey guys what’s going on this is Willza99 also known as the chivalrous gamer
Today I wanted to talk about something alot different than usual. This is more about progession and moving forward. This is something I bring up as it’s been a very big part of my life and also the hardest one to nail down.
As many of you know I stream on the weekends from about 9PM GMT onward on my twitch channel which a link can be found below. In the time I’ve been streaming properly, about 6 months near about. 6 months, thats near 24 weeks, thats about 48 streams I’ve done solidly.
I’ve streamed once or twice on the weekend and also through the week. So just over 50 streams.
It’s taken me 50 Streams, over 100 Youtube uploads and I’m willing to bet into the hundreds of hours of work spent on both of those. It’s taken me all that time to realise something that I still have troubles getting to grip with and honestly that is the fact that the learning curve isn’t smooth. It just isn’t, progress isn’t constant and the road to success has stepbacks.
In my personal life honestly my own health has been one of those issues, I did really well at one point and then I got complacent, but the dedication I required to do what I did then was beyond anything else, I was robotic in my actions and honestly I’m not proud of what I did or who I was because what I did was just inhuman and had no emotion attached.
I do no-where near what I used to do now and I’m happy for it, I’m a man who can’t imagine a middle ground so I go all out or not at all, I’m a man of extremes. Part of moving on from what I used to do was to learn to be more humble and be more accepting of where I am but to keep trying to push forward.
Bringing that back round to what I do here and on my stream, I’ve done quite well on both fronts. But there is still something that I just want to address and get out there so maybe someone watching will know and will learn. I never believed the hype I’d hear about how hard it is to keep pushing and keep working and I bet I’ve not even seen the worst of it yet because the higher you are the harder you fall. But recently I’ve brought my Twitch channel all the way up to 99 followers. I never thought I’d have anywhere near 100 people care enough to think “Yea this guy is alright, I like him” but here i was at the 99 follower mark and just 1 away.
Then as if it were out of some sort of movie I fell, only slightly but I fell to 98 after being stagnent for 2 weeks at 99 and each week the hope of someone pushing it over deminishing, I still fell. This week i fell again to 97 which was admittedly another kick to when I was down.
I also noticed a fall on my Youtube channel. I have small enough channels to notice this thing and I care enough that I do notice.
And trust me, as much as it sucks to have someone turn around and just go “no more” you fall into a weird feeling of peace about it, my twitch channel can honestly lose more followers and it will sting, it will sting like all hell that people just don’t think i’m good enough to do this but here’s the rub – They’re not turning up to the streams so why does that follow number matter? I’m playing games for fun and for myself not the mass so why does that follow number matter? I’m here trying to build a community however big or small that people will allow so that everyone can share their true love and passion about gaming and being a nerd because THAT is what matters! Not some stupid follow number, not some subscriber number.
The passion I have for what I do isn’t in the views or the subscriptions or the follows. The pasion I have is in the kind words of the awesome people who follow along and join in.
So from the bottom of my heart to the top of my passion I thank each and every one of you who watch, who take part, who talk to me whilst i’m streaming and talk to each other. I feel such pride when I see the people in teh chat getting on and joking around with each other.
But I want to thank the people who left also, because if it wasn’t for that I’d have my priorities wrong and wrapped up in some stupid number.
So thank you everyone, thank you.
I’ve been Willza99 also the ChivalrousGamer and I love you guys.